Didnt realize I didnt do a new years post... it was boring anyway... you know some days i'm ok but that means like okay not good not bad just okay...and then i'm not also i'm not taking my meds regularly i blame that on vacation + booster + period gotta find that routine again... missing meds is probably not helping
so its weird; like i kind of want to have it out or write a letter or something but i also dont want to bother because why should i? i mean things, even friendships run their course right... even the ones that have been around the longest... its just weird
work is alsosuper annoying but im gonna just put my head down and get shit done im so exasperated with everyone there, and sometimes i feel like i get stuff done then most of the time lately its just being taken advantage of, this management reorg has been terrible; at least i'm not the only one who thinks so...
eric has been like busy or just out/offline since that emergency thing in stl... and i messaged him knowing he hasnt been on the app lately because i came to a realization/conclusion the other day that all i really want, like right now is for someone to give me a hug, but not just someone, someone who cares, and i feel like cares and not cares because they're familially obligated to... just someone who can wrap their arms around me and give me a hug so i can take a second and relax and let them hold me so i can breathe... thats all i want... doesnt even have to last that long... and i also think dude thats so pathetically sad...
ugh 2022 is off to a smashing start....
