Perspective perception

 I've been thinking lately and I think I've mentioned it before but I feel like people who encountered the MH system as kids specifically in the 80s have a vastly different experience on the subject. I feel like people who start as adults or even teenagers in some respect have a different experience largely because they more often than not were probably (at least nowadays) the person initiating the contact I remember as a kid being asked 'why i was here' and my standard answer was well my mom brought me. I disliked most of the shrinks i had as a kid, the school psychologist wasn't terrible but as a kid having an appointment with the school psychologist in the middle of the day is weird. Coming in late Thursdays is weird. Having to try to explain these is weird. Its hard to trust maybe that's just me but its also a function of that, like as a kid your drs talk to your parents, that doesn't happen as an adult. There's a measure of self preservation that goes into discussions with shrinks that will be relayed to a parent than one where you go in and know it wont.... Like I know it wont anymore but I still do the self preservation thing... like Margaret asks me what I want to work on and sometimes beforehand I think maybe I could work on this but when it comes to it I never open the dialogue, the can of worms is a specter of chaos that hangs over me. I wish I could make this make sense to other people but I don't think I can.